Self Confidence and Self Esteem are tricky things!
Over confident, we risk:
- getting bloated and egoic;
- overestimating our abilities;
- putting ourselves in real danger.
Under confident, we risk:
- doubting our own value;
- developing a sense of low self-worth;
- failing to live up to our potential.
One of the challenges with confidence is that you may not know that you haven’t gone far enough or that you’ve gone too far until you experience the outcome. It is difficult to know in advance what might happen when you carry a particular mindset about confidence.
But you can be sure of one thing: somewhere between the two extremes mentioned above there is a balance, a place where you have a strength of character blended gracefully with humility. It’s a powerful combination when attained. And there is a very high probability that you have already experienced this combination at some point in your life—even if it seems to elude you today.
To remember such an experience, all you really have to do is think back to a time—a peak experience, if you like—when you felt like you were in the flow, when everything seemed to be moving in a harmonious direction for you. Perhaps you remember skiing down a particularly difficult mountain; perhaps you were dancing the most exquisite tango of your life; perhaps you were standing at the top of a hill overlooking a cove and watching dolphins or whales do their thing. It doesn’t really matter about the details of the experience. What matters is how you felt.
We’ve all had experiences like this in our lives, experiences where we felt perfectly aligned with who we are and our place in the world. Experiences in which we knew without doubt that we had all the power and courage and capability we’d ever need to do whatever we chose to do. And we knew this without any sense of ego or superiority. We knew this with total clarity…AND humility!
So, the real question is:
What is it that blocks us from that harmonious, confident state of presence?
Lots of things. And they all have one thing in common. They’re all in your head! In your head like zombies! Droning on about:
- not good enough;
- can’t make mistakes;
- I can’t do that;
- I failed before;
- and on and on and on…
As always, there is good news here, and the Soul Talk Guys are making this the topic of Episode 73. You see, you have the ability to change your mind—in more ways than you know! Neuroplasticity is the ability for you to recondition, retrain, and re-balance what goes on in your own head. So, in a very real sense, finding the appropriate balance of confidence and humility is no further than a choice away.
Join Tommy & David for another stimulating conversation and teaching that will help you to master yet another important area of your life.