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Each of us experiences a process of conditioning that starts shortly after we arrive here in the physical plane. The process begins as our parents or primary caregivers teach us all the rules that we are supposed to follow. If we fail to observe a rule, we usually also experience escalating levels of punishment—not because anyone is deliberately trying to hurt us, but because the people in charge believe that we really need to learn these rules in order to mature into upstanding citizens of our communities. As we grow up, the responsibility for enhancing and expanding our learning is transferred to other authority figures in our lives. This list grows progressively larger, to include school teachers, religious mentors, law enforcement officials, medical professionals, political leaders, and others.

The implied message in all of this couldn’t be clearer: we are not qualified to make our own decisions or live our own lives, and we must be indoctrinated and molded into an acceptable way of being. It turns out that most of us believe this unspoken message, and we unconsciously do whatever we can to take on the obligations handed to us so that we don’t upset the applecart!

The problem is that, in going along to get along, the weight of those obligations continues to grow. We end up disconnecting from our true selves in the bargain, and we may not even realize this until we are in our 40s or later wondering why we are so unhappy and unfulfilled. Sooner or later, however, the realization hits us, and then we are faced with a choice about what we will do going forward.

In the upcoming episode of Life Mastery TV, we’ll consider some of our options as we face this turning point in our lives. I’ve invited Reverend Tomás Garza to join me for this conversation. Tomás brings his background as a coach, mentor and student of A Course in Miracles to the table, along with years of experience in dealing with this very issue. Here are some of the topics we’ll cover in this conversation:

The Weight of Obligations

The more we allow ourselves to be molded into something that is defined externally, the more we take on the increasing mantle of “responsibility” for adopting behaviors, attitudes, and qualities that are not part of our natural essence. How do we ditch these obligations and reclaim the truth of who we are?

The Cost of Obligations

Obligations are like heavy weights that we carry around with us everywhere we go. The more obligations we take on—especially if we do so unconsciously—the more impact they have upon us. It gets to the point where the things we really want to do with our lives seem to be further and further out of reach. But what is the ultimate cost?

A Path of Healing

True healing—returning to wholeness—takes place at the level of the mind; changes to the physical body may or may not follow, although they often do. One of the most important aspects of the healing path is to recognize, accept, and dissolve the illusion of separation so as to return to a wholistic state of Oneness.

The Nature of Miracles

We have a distorted view of miracles. Miracles are far more accessible than we know. At the deepest level, each of us is a miracle-creator or miracle-worker. A miracle is essentially any shift from ego to spirit, from fear to love, from separation to oneness. Miracles are quite easy to create, but we have convinced ourselves otherwise; when we heal ourselves, we reconnect to our divine creativity and resume performing miracles every day.

Releasing Obligations

The crushing weight of obligations can be enough to overwhelm even the strongest of individuals. When we realize that our obligations come mainly from a practice of giving in to social conditioning—and paying the price for it—we open the door to acceptance, which in turn allows us to begin the healing process.

In this life, commitments and obligations seem unavoidable. However, when we raise our awareness and stay aligned with who we really are, then we can choose our obligations consciously, so that they all somehow serve our highest good. In this way, we stay connected to our spiritual nature and never lose sight of the real reason we are here.